Legacy

It's crazy to think that this is the last day of the year - the last year of the decade. It's weird to think that in a few months I will be graduating from college. It's weird to think that 8 years ago I started high school. Time has gone by so fast. It's hard to believe another ten years has come and gone so quick. It seems like yesterday we were all scared about y2k. My family stocked up a bunch of water and can foods. I was living in Roswell, New Mexico - not sure if my computer and cell phone would work the next day. But here I am, blogging away on my computer ten years later. Seems like all is well.

The end of the year has always been pretty special. Three years ago, I guess I could consider it my call into ministry as I changed my major from bioengineering to religious studies. From that point, so many things began to open up as I began to enter into the things I was called to. The next year, I found myself at San Diego Winter Conference confronted by the reality that I was living to please other people more than my desire to please God. Last year, I found myself at onething conference realizing the call to be set apart for God wasn't about a radical, one time decision. It was a lifestyle that embodied an intimate understanding of who God is. Where did that lead me?

Well, it lead me to to this crazy year. One of the weirdest and most unexplainable years of my life. I honestly can't put my finger on what has happened this year. I know that this semester has been one of the hardest times I have experienced in the longest times. I have been through a lot of stuff that is hard to understand why it happened. From losing ties to close friends and mentors, to going through darkest points of my personal life, it's been a struggle. I've been through so many highs and so many lows. And yet, in the midst of it all, I can say God is good. I have learned more and more that God's grace and His love is so good. When you go through good times its easy to take those things for granted. But when you mess up, fail, and go through valleys of darkness, you realize just how good God is in spite of your weakness.

In the midst of it all, I have learned a lot about myself and a lot about where I have come from as a person. I have learned my weaknesses and the areas of my life that need healing. I have learned a lot of bad, but I have also learned a lot of good. I have learned a lot about my cultural identity as a Filipino, I have learned a lot about my personal identity, and more recently about my familial identity and the legacy of my relatives who came before me.

As I sat down with my Aunt Lorna today to talk about the Philippines, missions, and my family, I found that there is so much in my family that affects who I am today. I learned a lot about my family and the legacy they have left behind.

Just today, I found out that my great-grandparents were the first people on my Dad's side who were Christian. In the early 1900s, missionaries from America came and introduced Jesus to my family. Prior to that, much of my family was raised as Catholics due to the Spanish influence since the 1500s. So to be Jesus followers was a radical thing for my great grandparents. They were looked down upon by their family and the community. But they were strong in their faith. They planted a church and saw many of their brothers and sisters transformed by the love of Jesus. My great-grandparents were uneducated but they had this passion to see their family know the transformational power of the gospel. They passed this down to my grandfather. He too had a heart to serve and to love others in the way that his parents did. My grandfather married his wife who was Catholic. But my Aunt Lorna told me how through my grandfather's influence, my grandmother and her family came to follow Jesus as well. My aunt described how my grandmother's family was not won over by a message of condemnation. Instead,they were won over by the lifestyle and example of my grandfather.

My grandfather thus continued in the legacy and lifestyle of missions as lived out by his father. My grandfather was very active in his church. He even gave up a well-paying job he had to go serve in a new ministry in which he helped to plant a school amongst the Muslim Filipinos of the Southern Philippines. In this endeavor, he worked with a missionary named Frank Laubach (Check out info on him: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Laubach). Frank Laubach was a prominent missionary who became known as the "apostle to the illiterates" because he brought the gift of written language to the Maranao people of the Southern people. He developed a influential system of education known as "each one teach one." He taught the Maranao people how to read and write in their own language. Thus, my grandfather helped set up and run one of this first schools from scratch. He would later go on and travel to many other parts of the islands planting and developing schools from scratch. Thus very early on, missions and education was a big part of my family. Many of family members were bright scholars who received Ph.D's in America and were gifted in areas such as sciences, linguistics, and languages. Since my family traveled so much with my grandfather, they picked up many of the local Filipino dialects.

According to my aunt, my grandfather was a man who was not concerned with material things. He had a heart for his fellow people and lived a life of simplicity. My grandmother also was an incredible woman. She was a gifted musician. My aunt mentioned that she could play anything by hear. If someone wanted accompaniment for a singing piece, she would merely listen to the tune and play accordingly. She would transpose anything if necessary. There hasn't been as skilled of a musician in my family since her.

It's just crazy to see this crazy legacy of education, missions, and music that is part of my family line. There have also been some negative aspects along with that. My family has suffered some health problems such as heart issues that have prematurely have taken the lives of many members of my family before they were able to live their destiny out fully.

Yet in delving into my family history, I have learned so much about myself and where I have come from. If there has been one thing that I have learned this year, it has been identity. I have learned about my cultural identity as a Filipino, I have learned more about my cultural identity as a Catedral, and each day, I have learned more about my ultimate identity as a beloved son. When it comes down to it, the most significant part of my identity is that I am loved. Everything else flows from this insight. It has been the hardest part to learn because I have been so performance driven - who wouldnt be in trying to live up to such a family legacy? But the beauty of it is that I don't have to do anything to live up to my family who came before. All I have to do is be me - be loved.

It's been a long and hard year, but I'm so thankful the parts of my identity that have been revealed to me. Through the pain and through the hard times, it has been worth it all to find out where I have come from. The enemy has tried to hide and steal away my identity for so long. But as I begin to get a clearer picture of my identity, I have a renewed excitement and passion to pursue my destiny.

So here's to a New Year! May 2010 be a year of discovering our identity and pursuing our destiny! Thank God for another year!