Happy New Year from DBA...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7xGZl1B8-U

A good night

Man, tonight was one of those unforgettable nights that you look back on and think, "did that really just happen?" David and Lorna Joannes from Ako ay Pilipino Movement came and shared with some Filipino friends and family at my church today. It was somewhat of a culmination of about a month of crazy divine appointments since the day after Thanksgiving. I'm kinda tired and sickly right now, so I can't fully process everything, but all I can say that it was truly incredible.

Everything fell into place in exactly God's timing and way. It was amazing to see my family so passionate and excited about serving David and Lorna and facilitating their time here in Phoenix. My parents went out of their way to prepare food, clean the house, and make phone calls all day to tell friends and family about tonight's get together. It was really strange to me because my parents had never met David and Lorna. All they saw was the book the helped put together and my short little spiel about God doing stuff in the Filipino community. All I can say is that it had nothing to do with me. It was definitely all God.

I look back at all the things that have happened, and its like a crazy fairytale that I feel I don't belong in. I've had the craziest stretch of my life in the past semester and struggled with so many sin issues. Suffered from people-pleasing, performance issues and so much more. I look at all the good things I have done in my life, and I am reminded that my righteousness is nothing but filthy rags. But that's the beauty of it I suppose. It's all about grace. God has given us a good thing that we dont deserve. Man, I thought I understood it before. I thought I had it all figured. I remember reciting the definition of grace in AWANA: "Grace is a free gift that we don't deserve." If I only knew what it really meant back then, I probably wouldn't use the word so flippantly. But I realize that I still don't get it. God is soooo good. I don't even understand.

Anyway, it was so amazing to see my family so excited and so passionate for rediscovering their Filipino roots. You could sense the presence of God really stirring people as David and Lorna spoke at church tonight. Even before that, it was great to have them over at our house and chat over some delicious Filipino food. It was their first time meeting and eating with Filipinos in Arizona.

It has been so cool meeting them. It's like we have known each for so long because our hearts have been knit together with the same passions from rediscovering Filipino roots to planting churches amongst unreached people groups. I think one of the craziest moments was having everyone at my house gathered around the table to watch some of their videos about planting underground churches in East Asia. The stories are incredible. The favor of God and is hand is definitely over them, and it was such an honor to have them in my home.

It was just a really crazy night - down to the fact that Sara and Donna from Hawaii missed their flights and ended stranded here (which is the third time now for Sara). Good things always seem to happen when they get stuck here though haha. Anyhoo, it's so cool to see what God is doing. How he uses me and all of us in spite of our weaknesses and inadequacies. I'm also excited that David and Lorna will be coming to speak at our church again. I pray for more divine appointments; for more hearts to be stirred; and more encounters with the presence of God.

Ahhh....so crazy. God what are you up to? What a crazy adventure!

More Filipino Craziness

Ahhh sooo goood! Some friends from the Ako ay Pilipino Movement are gonna be in Phoenix tonight to meet with the Filipino Community and share some of what God has placed on their hearts. God is stirring the hearts of many people to remember who they are and where they came from - to know there identity. I am praying for a powerful encounter tonight as many in the Filipino community will come face to face with reality of who God has called them to be and what He has destined them for. Its so crazy to think how all of the craziness and divine appointments of the past few weeks is culminating with an opportunity for the Filipino community to hear a prophetic message and encouragement of what He is doing to restore His people and call them back to their destiny.

As I talked to a friend earlier today, she mentioned that more and more she is realizing that missions is not about bringing a message from a point of superiority. Instead, it is about empowering people to be who God has made them to be. To go off of this, I was talking to my professor the other day about the new Filipino book called Ako ay Pilipino. When he heard that it was written by some missionaries, he asked me if the writing reflected some of the missionary mindsets of old. He was referring to some of the material we had read in our class that showed Christian missionaries forcing indigenous peoples of the Pacific Islands to give up their cultural values and traditions. I sat for a while, and I really believe that God gave me the words to speak in that moment. I mentioned that it was really interesting because what I see happening is that many missionaries I have met and come in contact with are "reminding people of who they are and not telling them who they should be." My professor was very surprised by this comment, and said that I was on to something and that I should keep delving into that idea.

It's so crazy to see what God is doing in recalling the cultural heritage of people and reminding them of their identity. At the end of the day, the pressure is off of us. We don't have to perform or try our hardest to put all the pieces together. This is something that I have been struggling a lot with lately. I have tried so hard to do things my own way and on my own time. I have failed a lot and overworked myself to the point of sickness and exhaustion. It is in these moments, that I am reminded that God loves me for who I am and not for what I do. We have a God who loves us not for what we do for Him but because of what He did for us. I am learning more and more what it means to rest in the reality that God loves me. That is our primary identity - to be loved by the King.

Check out these videos and be inspired by what God is doing amongst Filipinos as He is reminding them of who He made them to be.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Dnh4VH_D0Q&feature=player_embedded



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EBd4fGXR6Q&feature=player_embedded

Alex doin' some freestyle worship

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQl-FP9gVVk

Reminscing an EPIC year!

facebook link

Here's a look at our Epic year in review. It's been a crazy year with so many ups and downs, but God has been good. I definitely want to spend some more time reflecting on all the craziness that has happened. But we have definitely grown a lot and learned a lot. I was reminded of this video just the other day, and as I looked back on it, I was reminded once again of the goodness of God despite all the uncertainty around me. It's been a transitional year to say the least. But its always good look back and remember the faithfulness of God.

Ako ay Pilipino Movement

Got to hang out with David and Lorna Joannes, founders of the Ako ay Pilipino Movement today. You could sense that it was one of those crazy divinely-inspired appointments when Kelly, Miles, and I finally got to meet them.

What are the odds that the people who came up with the idea for a new book in the Philippines would be hanging out in AZ for the next month or so? They just came out with a new book called Ako ay Pilipino that's gonna help revive and restore Filipino identity and destiny across the globe. All across the globe, God is calling Filipinos to remember who they are, and He is reminding them what He says about them. These are exciting times for Filipinos!



Be apart of the movement.

Check it out yourself: http://akoaypilipino.multiply.com
http://www.akoaypilipinongayon.com/
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Ako-ay-Pilipino-Ngayon/152353495066/

Hit me up if you're interested in getting one of the books.

"Know your identity, pursue your destiny."

The Filipino Question: Are Filipinos Asian or Pacific Islander?

This semester I took a class on Pacific Islanders. It was really interesting to get a cultural perspective that I never really was fully aware of or understood. In learning about the Pacific Islands, I learned so much about the beauty of culture, the importance of relationships, as as well as learning about the social injustices and historical wounds that they have experienced.

Along the journey,I learned a lot about myself and my cultural identity. I realized that so much of my history and cultural identity has been covered up by titles and labels that I have blindly accepted but never questioned. As I have begun to dig deep into finding more about who I am, I have discovered a lot of things that have given me a greater appreciation for the beauty of culture and the creativity of God.

This video was a project that documented Filipino identity. I really didn't intentionally go into this project in the first place, but as I did, I began to learn a lot more about identity and how confusing it can be. But in learning about the past and remembering history, we learn so much about ourselves.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ciBmVL4pels

"Transforming Media & Entertainment"

For those of you who missed the Jaeson Ma's prophetic word about Transforming Media & Entertainment, check it out:

http://www.propheticmedia.com/video/xperience/xperience12_6_09teaching.mp4

It's a powerful word about how God is using media and entertainment to transform Hollywood. He is raising up young Asian Americans among many others who will make a profound impact on society and the world at large.

Community: Responses to Insecurity (Part 2)

One of the things I have realized is that one of the ways that the enemy tries to break up and confuse a community is through insecurity and isolation. God puts things on the hearts of many people. But so many times, they feel like they are the only ones with that passion. So there may be many people in a group who God is speaking similar things to - most likely complimentary things. But instead of recognizing the unity of what God is speaking, out of fear and uncertainty, people respond by doing things on their own rather than bringing others into it.

I think I am guilty of this a lot. I want things done on my time and in my way. But when people don't see things the exact same way that I do, I begin to feel inadequate and misunderstood. So often I fail to recognize that what God is putting on my heart is the same that He is putting on another's heart it's just packaged and understood in a different way. I run to conclusions rather than giving others the benefit of the doubt. If the person has a hard time communicating their ideas, then it becomes even more difficult. In the midst of these types of experiences, it is important to remember that we don't have to explain to other people what God has placed on our heart in order to be validated. If God has put something on heart, we have to go for it, and the rest will follow. We may be misunderstood at times, but one of the biggest principles in community is that TIMING IS EVERYTHING.

God has perfect timing and will do things in his way. We have to do what God has put on our hearts, but I believe we must also become aware of what God is putting on the hearts of others and discern the ways in which we can come together under a united vision for what God has for us.

But in order for this to happen we must communicate. I think one of the biggest things that hinder us is that when we face these difficulties we don't communicate. Community with one another and community with God are directly related. The way we relate to God will determine how we relate to others and the way we relate to God will determine how we relate others. If we don't spend time individually with God or with others and we are not spending time corporately with each other and corporately seeking God, what do we expect our results to be?

Our security above all is based in God, but since we also have a people part of us, community has such a vital role in reinforcing the things that God has placed on our heart. When we are in a healthy community that submits to one another in love and is willing to sacrifice for one another, I believe we will be able to piece the unique things that God has placed on our heart together.

So many times we come together, there is a lack of unity because there is a lack of security. Our group is individually lacking the fiery passion that comes from knowing God's passion for us, and likewise, when we come together, we lack belief that God is capable of the impossible.


Sometimes it takes the one bold person who has something in their heart to take the step of faith and believe that God will move in the hearts of others. Will you be that one? At the end of the day it comes back to knowing the goodness of Jesus. Security in him is what ultimately breeds confidence and dispels insecurity which will then catalyze authentic community.





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Excerpt from daily prayer devotional:

“He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8).

If one is to speak mightily for God, then one must walk humbly with God. Courage for Christ is a direct result of security in Christ. Prayer intensifies our fellowship with God. It is in that fellowship that the believer experiences the depth and width and height of the love of God. The Christian can face the gates of hell if he has been before the throne of heaven. Fear flees when one has basked in the perfect love of God.

Prayer:
Merciful, loving God, I long for deeper intimacy with You. Show me how to act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly in Your holy Presence so that my fellowship with You will bring transformation into the lives of others. In Jesus’ Name I ask this!

Live A Praying Life!

Community: Responses to Insecurity (Part 1)

Insecurity sucks. It breeds loneliness and attacks sense of worth. Have you ever felt super excited or passionate to do something, and then you go around your group of friends to tell them, but as you go there, you just can't share anymore? It's like the atmosphere totally shifts and you can sense the lack of care that the others around you have. As a result, you start to doubt yourself, and you think that the thing you were excited and passionate about isn't really that big of a deal.

Community is a double-edged sword. It can either build you up or tear you to pieces. That's why community is such a big deal, and that’s why there is such a battle over experiencing authentic, transformational community.

Like I said previously, for myself, I have become increasingly unsettled by seeing the insecurities, not only in myself, but also, in seeing the insecurities in others. Why? Because if I am insecure and the people that I am around are insecure than we are just hiding away from each other and remaining in isolation - so in truth, we aren't really being a community. This breaks my heart because individually and corporately we are not living up to the fullness that God desires and has in store for us.

What I see in myself and in others is that I become passive and begin to suffer from unbelief. I don't step out into what God has for me because I begin to doubt that what He says will really happen. So with that, I have had two recent revelations.

The first one stems from a devotional reading I had this morning:

If one is to speak mightily for God, then one must walk humbly with God. Courage for Christ is a direct result of security in Christ. Prayer intensifies our fellowship with God. It is in that fellowship that the believer experiences the depth and width and height of the love of God. The Christian can face the gates of hell if he has been before the throne of heaven. Fear flees when one has basked in the perfect love of God.

The part that really rocked me was the part that stated "Courage for Christ is a direct result of security in Christ." Wow! So basically, I am passive and lack courage because I am insecure of who I am in Christ. How is this remedied? By spending time with God of course. But I think we can dig into this thought a little more.

As I was talking to my brother tonight, he said something I found pretty profound. He said that if we don't spend time on something, we become insecure when we actually have to do it. Say for instance playing the piano or any hobby or interest you might have. If you don't spend time playing and practicing the piano, when you actually have to play, you will be insecure playing it because you haven't spent time doing it. We are uncomfortable with the things that we don't do. This goes for people too. If we don't spend time with people, we are less likely to open up to them.

So then how do we think it works with God? Why are we struggling with fear of the impossible? Why don't we believe God for big things? Well, we are insecure of the things that we don't spend time with. If we don't spend time with God, how will we have confidence that He will come through for us.

This revelation really rocked me because I have realized how the enemy has attacked my use of time lately. I have put everything in front of God. As a result, I have increased fear and insecurity because I haven't spend time with God. So instead of growing in faith, I grow in fear because I think we really do fear the unknown.

Which leads me to an interesting quote that I saw tonight as well:

The number one sign of a religious spirit is passivity, and the number two sign is a poverty mindset - Graham Cooke

This quote is so crazy. When we become passive and face unbelief, we have lost our passion and devotion to God. Instead of having a passionate relationship, we fall into the one thing we all want to avoid - a religious, legalistic spirit. But when we don't step into faith, we are passive. When we don't believe that God will show up and do things we live in a mindset of poverty forgetting that we have access to every good thing that the Father has!

My friend Lauren has some amazing things to say on this idea. Why don't we believe what God says? Why do we base our faith on experiences? When we base our faith on experiences, we become insecure because we don't always see good results, and likewise our faith is based on unstable circumstances. But our faith isn't dependent on circumstances. Our faith is in God, who is always faithful and wants to show up more than we want him to show up! Read Lauren's Blog for more profound truths about this:

http://laurennanson.blogspot.com/2009/11/im-confused-but-im-not-budging.html


So the first profound truth for me is that confidence comes from being with and knowing God. We don't believe for big things and don't step out to see the impossible because we haven't had daily revelation of the majesty of God and His profound love for us. But just knowing God and praying is the first step. We still have to actually step out and do it.

This leads me to the second revelation. One of the most profound truths I have realized in my life is this idea that we have a God-sized vacuum in our life and we have a people-sized vacuum. We can't substitute one for the other. We need to have both. So when it comes to community, we need each other to combat the insecurity we face day to day.
In my next blog, I will examine the ways that people influence the way we experience God and ourselves.

Insecurity

Lately, I have been super insecure. I have had this irrational fear of my own inadequacy and a fear of the way others view me. I'm super insecure right now about writing this blog thinking that you will probably judge me. We all go through this I'm sure, but lately it has been really bad. It has been almost debilitating. Instead of stepping out and being who God had made me to be, I cower in fear and insecurity. This bothers me a lot because I see it not only in myself, but I see this passivity and insecurity in those around me.

Recently, I went to the Filipino club here on campus to hang out and show a video my group made for a class presentation. Some of the students in the club were featured in the video. As the video started and even before it started, it was amazing to see people who were in the video run out of the room because they were embarrassed of hearing and seeing themselves on video. Now, I can't blame them. I probably would be a little awkward too. As they movie went on, some of the students were laughing and kind of making fun of some of their friends in video. There seemed to be a general lack of interest in the video until the end, when people got silent and seemed to pay attention for once in the video. It was the part that mentioned we must remember who we are and featured a quote by Jose Rizal, a national hero of the Philippines. The quote was "He who does not know how to look back at where he came from will never get to his destination."

Now, I could skim over this sequence of events like it has no significance to the rest of my life. But I can't do that because I really feel like God is speaking to something bigger in this whole situation.

If you have read through my last few blog posts, you might now that God has really been putting the Filipino community on my heart in the past few days. It all began a while back, but this new fervor for the Filipino community came about this past Friday when I was awoken at 5am. If you look at my past blog, you will see that I was suffering from a lot of insecurity and awkwardness that morning. But it was through that God really reminded me of my identity and called me back to learning and understanding the cultural identity and destiny he has set forth for Filipinos.

Later that morning, I began to discover the prophetic destiny of the Philippines and hear some of the powerful words that have been spoken concerning this nation. It was an amazingly inspiring and empowering moment. Later that day, I was totally flipped upside down as I began to suffer a lot of spiritual attack and fell into sin. I confessed and got right with God again, and the next night as I was doing research I was led to a movement in the Philippines that is doing exactly what God has put on my heart - telling Filipinos who God says they are! A couple days later, I began to struggle again and experienced more spiritual attack as I again I fell into sin. Interestingly enough, that night I was working on the video about Filipinos that I was going to show to my class and that I showed to the Filipino club. All this to say that as I have been pursuing the heart of God for the Filipino people, I have experienced a level of spiritual attack that I have not gone through in a while.

In the midst of all that, I just got a message this morning that the founder of the movement in the Philippines that I just started tracking that they will be in Arizona this week and would like to get in contact! Crazy! Random!? Odd or God? So I potentially have a chance to meet the founders of the Ako ay Pilipino movement, God-willing. So pray for that.

Anyway, I share my heart again about the Filipinos because it has been through these experiences that God really spoke to me about the situation that happened at the Philippine club just today. Before, I went to the Philippine club I spent some time praying and coming before God. I haven't desperately called out to God in so long, but today there was breakthrough. I began to cry out for God and come before him in prayer in a way that I haven't experienced in far too long. Today, I also began praying for the Philippines. Now, I have never really prayed for the Philippines quite so fervently before. But today something was different, I started crying out to God for my people. It was a pretty powerful moment.

In that time, God began to speak to me through that incident on Friday morning again when he woke me up. What came to mind was that the insecurity and passivity I was experiencing that morning was what the Filipino community was experiencing as a whole. That thought really struck me, but then then I forgot about it until tonight when I went to the Filipino club. It seems to make sense why people ran out of the room when they were about to be shown on the video. It makes sense why there was a interest and a focus on the part that talked about remember where we came from.

The Filipino community is suffering a lot of insecurity right now. My friend put it like this, "hey man, read your blog. I have been pondering about Filipino stuff, too. I was doing a little research on filipino history, yesterday - colonialism etc. I had a lot of questions about filipino identity, and such. Ya, I feel there's still a lack of unity, and a unified culture, and a sense of self. Just thought I'd share that w you." The Filipino identity has been wounded and damaged by a history of colonialism and corruption. There is a lack of unity in the community. In fact, what I sensed tonight was a spirit of apathy and indifference. But as my friend Kelly has mentioned, it is so subtle that you can hardly recognize unless you know what is at stake.

I really believe that Filipinos are suffering from insecurity because they don't know who they are. They have taken on the titles that other have placed on them such as Asian or Pacific Islander because it is easy for others to understand. But what taking these titles has done is stripping away personal and corporate identity for the sake of taking on someone elses conception of who they think we are. There is a self-hate in our community. The enemy has caused us to hate ourselves because if we hate ourselves, we wont want to really know who we are or take the effort to find out.

Now this doesn't only relate to Philippines. I think it goes for all people. But God has been really showing me how these hurts have built up individually in me and culturally as a people group. I believe that in seeing some of these things, it informs the way I am able to pray and be aware of what is at stake individually and corporately. It is not a mistake that I have struggled so much lately. It is not a mistake that I have been feeling so insecure and now recognizing it in others. What we experience in the physical is an indicator of the spiritual.

The enemy doesn't want us to know who we are, but when we try there will be opposition. That's where community comes in. I'll try to talk more about that in my next post.