TheCall and other miscellaneous shenanigans

So, I've tried to write this blog like three times, and I failed in doing so the first few times. So I am trying again now that I am re-energized by some Jesus loving at all campus worship tonight. Man, I have been unbelievably frustrated in the last few days, weeks, etc. I have been frustrated at a lot of things, but tonight I got to experience the refreshment of God's love thanks to one of my brothers in Christ who really lifted me up today with some awesome words of encouragement. So ya now that my mind is experiencing a lot more clarity and peace, I'm going to try to recap some of the crazy things that have happened in the past couple weeks or so.

I went to TheCall California this weekend. It was intense - as you would probably expect from 12 hours of fasting and praying. I had a lot of mixed feelings during the event. Like at times I was really into it and a lot of times I wasn't. It was kinda hard because I think I may have been expecting things for myself that weren't necessarily what God wanted for me. But in the end, I know that God showed up in amazing ways, and I am very glad that I had the opportunity to be there. Being at TheCall really opened up my eyes to the importance of intercession for our nation, our society, our families, our generation. It was so awesome to see so many lovesick worshippers crying out to God.

Oh ya, one thing that really made me happy was that I got to see Daniel, Albert, and Howie after TheCall. I got to go out to eat with Daniel and catch up some. It was like a mini-Epic reunion. And it made my heart happy. So I forgot to mention this when I first wrote my blog, but it was so important to my happiness that I had to go back and edit this into my blog. So it might be kind of random, but it makes me happy so that's all that matters.

Oh and another thing, I got prayed for by someone who had been delivered by a lot of sexual sins and other things while we prayed against sexual immorality in America. His prayer really encouraged me, and it was cool to be surrounded by so many believers. The worship was really awesome too. At the end of the service, there was lots of awesome dancing going on - undignified style. It was legit!

One point that really sticks out to me is when Lou Engle gave his vision of a series of 40 day fasts in California. He has a vision of different ethnic groups such as Chinese, Latino, Korean etc. and other groups such as the Catholics and university students joining together to do a series of 7 forty day fasts throughout the year in the upcoming year. Next, a guy came up and marveled at the vision Lou came. He was so inspired not only by the vision but by the response of the people. The guy speaking stated that he knew God was on the move on the hearts of people because if wasn't all the people would think Lou Engle was crazy for thinking that 7 forty day fasts was even feasible. And how true is that? How crazy is it that there are pockets of people in America that are so sold out for Jesus that the thought of 7 forty day fasts is even conceivable. God definitely is on the move in peoples hearts, and it is an exciting time to see people laying down the things of the world for things of God.

I guess I sometimes forget how much God is really moving in our nation and in peoples' lives. I am so used to moving at a fast rate that I get frustrated when I don't see what I expect. I get frustrated when people don't catch God's vision for simple church planting and 24hr prayer. I get frustrated when people don't excited about the move of God or aren't aware of the amazing things He is doing around the nation and around the world. I often find myself getting in this elitist mindset of thinking that I know and have more than others. I get frustrated and even angry at others sometimes. Also, lately my attitude has been so volatile. Some days I will be really happy and excited, and most other days I am really frustrated and upset at the situations around me, others, and myself. One thing God was really showing me and working on my heart at the Call was this issue of being up and down in my attitude and my overall feelings. I have realized that when I am with crazy, Jesus loving people, I usually am pretty happy and upbeat. However, when I am around Christians who are not so high on Jesus, I find myself being dragged down by their temperament. I am really frustrated by this because lately instead of helping others see the awesomeness of Jesus, I am brought down by their lack of passion. I find that this translates into my frustration with the church.

Lately, I can't really go to organized church or even a lot of other Christian events like my Campus Crusade weekly meetings. It is not that I have anything against these ministries. I love what God is doing there, and I know there has been so much progress there. However, I feel such an emptiness and feel brought down sometimes when I go to these events. This is part of what I'm talking about when I say that my temperament has been up and down. It's like I sense the lack of Holy Spirit power and instead of bringing the Holy Spirit, I feel emotionally drained and frustrated by what's going. I find myself drawn to the 24-7 prayer house and to my Epic simple church because I see community being developed there, and I see edification of the body of Christ. Again, it is not like these things are not happening in organized church or weekly meetings, but I feel such a frustration towards these things right now because I have not been able to find the balance between ministering and ministering toward others. I have not been able to find the balance of holding on to my joy in every situation.

As you can see, it's a really weird season for me. I am having a hard time really keeping myself together. I feel like I am working too hard sometimes to see breakthrough when God just wants me to rest in His love for me. I feel like I am constantly attacked by lies and worries over many things. I am frustrated by these things that afflict me. But at the end of the day, God is inviting me to remember that He loves me with an everlasting love and that there is nothing I need to do experience the fullness of this love. I was really encouraged by one of my brothers in Christ today as he encouraged me and really reminded me that God was proud of me and loved me even in my frustration and anxiety. I know I must surrender all to him and allow Him to have all of me for all of Him.

Anyway back to TheCall. So the trip was pretty exhausting. My group left at 4:00Am on Saturday and got to San Diego at 9:40am. Prayer and worship went on from 10am to 10pm. It was craziness. Then, my group needed to leave right away, so after getting some food, we left around 12:30am and got back to Phoenix at around 6:30am. I had to drive from like 1:30 til we got home. I was driving on like one hour of sleep and so ya it was pretty exhausting. I got home and ended up sleeping from like 7:30am until 5:00pm that night. But the trip was worth every hour of lost sleep and the exhaustion that came with it. I am still trying to process everything that happened. And even though I can't put a finger on it right now, I know that God awakened and maybe even started something new in my heart.

So throughout the day, we prayed for various issues. It was really cool because a lot of the issues that were prayed for dealt with racial reconciliation. It was amazing to see groups like Asian Americans, Latinos, Black Americans, Native Americans etc go up and pray for the nation. It was so cool to see Catholics and Protestants and so many other diverse groups come together and pray for the nation. People were able to put away any sectarian differences and come together for the common pursuit of knowing and loving Jesus. It was so great to see these different groups cry out to God. It was especially moving to see the Latino community worship and cry out. There cries were so vibrant and so passionate. It is great to see the Latino community being raised up to fight against injustice and proclaim the love of God.

Dr. James Dobson and his wife Shirley were there. They are the founders of Focus on the Family. It was so awesome to see such amazing men and women of God at this event. It really reflected the oneness of heart that is being developed among leaders in America. It was so cool to see these two influential people supporting what God was doing that Saturday in San Diego. Many people made mention that being at TheCall on that Saturday was the most important place to be at in light of the upcoming elections. The stadium was filled with lots of people. It was hard to gauge how many people there because there were lots of people on the field and many more others scattered throughout the stadium seats. There were so many influential Christian leaders. It was so cool to see influential Christian leaders whose names are well-known come together really just humble themselves and give all glory to God.

Like I said, the event was kind of weird for me at times because I felt like my heart was hardened at times. I don't know if it was really hardened, but a lot of the issues we prayed for didn't really hit hard in my heart at times. I think some of this was because of issues I mentioned before. Anyways, this really made me appreciate those who have been battling in intercession for years, and it really encourages me to press into intimacy with God that He may give me strength and fuel to continue in intercession. Yet in the midst of this mentality, God really broke my heart as we began to pray over abortion.

I haven't really felt this broken over an issue in a really long time. But as we prayed, God broke my heart for the babies who lost their lives. I began to weep uncontrollably as the Holy Spirit moved my heart for these babies. It's crazy because I used to think that abortion was not that big of a deal when I was younger. But lately, I have really come to realize the magnitude of this issue. Without the ending of abortion, we will never see revival in America because the shed of innocent bloodshed invokes a curse on our nation. But throughout the entire day of prayer, it was really the issue of abortion that hit my heart had. Like I said, I didn't' really experience the Holy Spirit in maybe what I would have expected. But through this process of breaking my heart for the issue of abortion, I know that God really was present and doing something in my heart and in my life that I have yet to really understand or see the fullness of.

Some of the coolest and really inspiring parts of TheCall were when Jesse Engle came up and just poured out his heart and his vision for the emerging generation. It was awesome to be part of the younger generation that was there. A lot of the stuff that was prayed over had to do with things that seemed like they were more for adults. Not that praying and political issues were only for adults, but the way they were presented seemed to be the older generation. Yet, when the younger generation came up and worshipped and prayed, it was such a dynamic experience. It's so awesome to see a younger generation so passionated for Christ. It's amazing to hear their testimonies and their prayers for the emergence of an even younger generation of lovesick worshippers.

In addition to all this were the crazy testimonies of deliverance. There were those delivered from drugs and sexual immorality. There were stories of those struggling with homosexuality who had supernatural encounters with Christ and turned their lives around. It's awesome to hear about the the 24/7 prayer house in San Francisco dedicated to praying for the deliverance and salvation of homosexuals and others who are oppressed in San Francisco. God definitely began breaking my heart for the homosexual community and the sanctity of marriage. I feel like God really opened my heart and my mind to see the importance of intercession for the government and political arena.

I guess the part that was really special for me was when Jaeson Ma came out and prayed for the Asian American population and talked about revival on campuses. He talked about how Bill Bright and Billy Graham were mentored by Henrietta Mears and took the burning heart contract in which they made a convenient with one another and with God to contend for revival on the campuses. Jaeson also talked about how Bill Bright prophesied that the next campus revival would occur when Koreans and other Asian Americans gathered together and prayed for revival on the campus. He prayed that God would impart fire into our hearts and raise up a generation of Asian Americans that would contend for revival on campus. He also talked about how God was calling university students to fast for 40 days in 2009. It was a pretty powerful experience to see Jaeson Ma and Brian Kim impart their fire and passion for Christ onto the Asian Americans and universities students in general. It was definitely pretty awesome to be part of that experience.

I pray that God would continue to raise up a generation of Asian Americans and other university students to take on the initiative of praying and fasting for breakthrough on our campuses. It is so exciting to see what God wants to do and how others are beginning to respond to this calling. I am so inspired to see others being raised up this call and responding passionately to what God is doing in this generation.

So ya, it's been an interesting journey this past few weeks. I was supposed to go to California with the Filipino club the week before, but somethings came up that discouraged from going. In the end, I was able to go home for the weekend and spend some much needed time with the family. It was so awesome to be able hang out, go shopping with them, and eat some good food. I got some new glasses, new shoes, and my ring engraved. I got a covenant ring to signify my commitment to what God is doing in this generation, but that's a different story in itself. But anyway, last weekend was cool to be able to rest and connect with the family. It is such a blessing to have a loving family who shows so much love and support. I am so thankful to God for that blessing, and it is something that I never want to take for granted.

So my California Adventure was kind of derailed a bit, but in the end, I know it was for the best. I know I need to still kind of process everything that has happened, and it's going to take some time. But I know God did some awesome things in my life, and when I get through this season of frustration and hardships, I know that it will begin to make more sense.

On a lighter note, my discipleship group went sharing today. We were praying for insight into who we should talk to. One of the guys in my group said he had an image of a guy with a blond hair, a blue shirt, khaki pants, and that maybe his name was kyle. There was four of us in the group and so we divided in twos. So two of us started walking around looking for who we should talk to. Neither of us really got much insight on who to talk to, so we kind of just started asking God to point us in the right direction. We went towards the library and started talking to someone we knew for Crusade. As were talking to him, I pointed out to my friend a guy who I thought might fit the description given by my other friend. He was wearing a blue shirt and khaki pants and had blond hair. As he was walking past us, my friend yelled, "Kyle." At first, I was kind of confused that my friend knew the guy walking by. But then I realized that he was just saying the name that my other friend mentioned while praying. The guy stopped and looked at us. My friend then asked if his name was Kyle, and the guy was like "ya, my name is Kyle." I started laughing. Haha....seriously, God is crazy man. Everything that my friend got in prayer was made known right before even right down to his name. That's pretty intense. I haven't seen anything that specific happen before, but it was a cool little encouragement from God. Kyle was on his way out, but we got to pray for him and encourage him. He said he went to Navigators a couple of times, so ya, pray that God gets Him good! Woot!

But ya, I need to go sleep now. That's always a good thing. But with the elections at large, God put on my heart to pray Luke 18 - the parable of the persistent widow. In the midst of political uncertainty and corrupt leadership, God says in Psalm 118:8-9, "It is better take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man. It is better to take refuge than to trust princes." Even though there is so much uncertainty with the upcoming elections, we must trust that God knows best and is always faithful to provide. He demonstrates this in Luke 18.


Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. He said: "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men.
And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.'"For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!' " And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off ? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?"

God hears our prayers and is faithful to provide for in our persistence. God will provide for us and will answer our prayers when we seek him day and night. As the elections are rapidly approaching in the next day, we must press in and seek God in prayer. It was mentioned tonight at the prayer house that these upcoming elections don't only affect the next 4 years but the next 40 years. We must pray that God has mercy on our nation. God is a God who delights in mercy, and when he shows mercy He is most glorified because he shows the great extent of His love. We must cry out for mercy, and we must plead for Christ's blood over our sins and over the sins of our generation. We must plead that Christ's blood reign supreme over the blood shed of over 50million babies lost to abortion. We must be like the persistentt widow in Luke 18 and contend with the government to hear our cries of justice. But most importantly, we must cry out to God to hear our cries of desperation and have mercy on our country in this desperate time.

God, we thank you that you are a God who loves, and God who has mercy. God, we ask that you would forgive us of our sins and for the bloodshed of innocent babies. Jesus, I plead your blood over my sins and the sins of my nation. God, end abortion and bring revival to America! Raise up desperation in our hearts once again. Draw our hearts to a radical life of fasting and prayer. Above all else, let us seek you in intimacy and find you in the quiet place. We need you, O God! You are our heart's one desire. God, may you raise up a generation who will run to you and strip off any weight or hindrance that keeps us from pursuing you whole-heartedly. God, we desire to pour out your love and to pour out your mercy. Come like the rain Lord. Open the flood gates, and pour out your favor upon America. We need you Jesus! The Spirit and the bride say come! In Jesus Name, Amen!