the night of graduation

So the night of my brother's graduation, my dad decided to have a devotional with the family. It was my mom, dad, brother, and I. My aunt, uncle, their two kids, my other aunt and my grandparents. We read a devotional which I think was David's prayer in 1 Chronicles 29 which ended up being the key verse that my pastor used in church today I think.

Anyway, as we did the devotional, my dad asked me to share my decision to switch majors and pursue the ministry. I talked about how God had showed me that I was pursuing my own dreams and my own ambitions, but I wasn't making room for God. The biggest turning point of my life was really when I gave up my dreams and ambitions to God, and just asked Him to give me the dreams and ambitions He gave me. This really was a big deal in my life, and it totally put me on the path that I am today. And after I shared that story, I just realized how much God has been working in my life and my family's life since then and even before then.

My brother then shared his experience at church camp last weekend and how God has totally been working in his life. It was pretty intense especially hearing it from his side of the story. After that all my other family members shared some experiences. It was crazy hearing from my aunts and uncles and grandparents. I heard stories and experiences from them that I never knew. I never knew my uncle's troubled past. I didn't realize my aunt's faith. But the one thing that really touched me was my grandmother's talk. My grandmother isn't a big talker especially on spiritual things. But when she talked, I was really touched.

She was talking in native tongue, which is ilongo. Luckily, I coudl understand most of it. But basically, she spoke pasionately about the hardships she faced growing up as a Christian. She said that she was the only Protestant in her family, and everyone else was Catholic. Her family would basically persecute her and ask her why she would always go to church - esp. a different one from theirs. But my grandmother said she never said anything, she just stayed faithful to God. Today, the church my family supports and helped built is made up mostly of my grandmother's family. She said how many of them today have accepted Christ as their Savior and are following Him.

It was awesome to hear the testimonies of my family and to see how God is working in their lives. It definitely is only the start of things to come. There still is so much hurting and brokenness in my family. The family is divided in many senses and there are a lot of disagreements that still need to be mended. But, the step of prayer and unity that we took Friday night was awesome. I know God is using my family to really begin to lay down the foundation of revival for the rest of my family.

But what I'm really beginning to realize is that it takes patience and time. I was reminded of my verse when I first got baptized. 1 Peter 5:6-7 says, "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." This verse really speaks to me because its all about humility. I have struggled with issues of pride a lot in my life. A lot of the times especially in these times, I really want to see God work and see personal breakthrough in my life. But a lot of times, I think this has lead to feelings of elitism and overconfidence. I want to see breakthrough; I want more of God. However, I am reminded that we must stay humble and allow God to fill us up and develop us. It is only when we allow Him to fill us up that we may be exalted in his proper time.

So ya, I dont know. God has been doing a lot of things in the past couple of days. Saturday was the really crazy day. I started writing about it, but there are some things that I dont know if I can really sure. But there were all divine appointments and conversations from God. It was crazy. But I'm just too exhausted to keep going at this point. I'll try to continue later. God is good, and I am so thankful that He is faithful, even in my weakness and unfaithfulness.